Caught off guard, I turned to the research I had done on healthy living because I knew I could heal myself. After all, I had done it before. Taking my health into my own hands, I started studying health coaching so that I could learn everything I needed to know about holistic healing, chronic illness, and mind-body medicine. 

After a few years of making progress earning certifications in holistic health, integrative nutrition, thyroid health, and transformational coaching, I learned more about all the things I thought I needed to know. The information led to some progress, but I was still suffering. 

I was at a plateau. The progress I thought I should be making wasn't happening anymore. I was panicked. 

There was so much judgment it hurt. I had invested so much time, money, and energy in learning, but I still couldn’t apply it. I was struggling to create the relief and freedom I knew was possible.

What was I missing? 

I was on the verge of another transformation. 

Pain and panic had been driving me to seek healing. But, this wasn’t helping me anymore. It was holding me back. Things had to change. I had to surrender for the struggle to end. I knew it from the deepest part of me. Judgment, control, and manipulation were taskmasters and they left no room for compassion, true self-care, and the real acceptance I so longed for. My body was asking me to do something different, but I still couldn’t hear the truth.

I got sick and tired of being sick and tired. I was f-ing done.

So, I shook things up. I looked with new eyes and heard with new ears. I experienced new things... and the plateau became a thing of the past. I could suddenly see that the way I was trying to heal myself was rooted in the same energy that got me sick.

It turns out that what I needed was something softer and kinder, yet still effective. Meeting myself with these qualities created a momentum of healing. I was blown away. Hmmm… was I onto something?